Category: Blog

  • The Black Sheep

    The Black Sheep

    They just don’t really understand you.

    You’re feeling like the black sheep once again.

    Your face flushed with pulsating heat, your palms slick with sweat, all the eyes in the room burning straight through you.

    Mortified, you long to fall into a black hole and disappear into the void.

    Speaking up in front of other people just isn’t your “thing.” Why isn’t it easier just to talk to people?

    Some call it being “the black sheep”- not fitting in anywhere, feeling like the odd one out.

    And that starts to feel lonely after a while.

    Not like the others…

    Everything about you is… different. From head to toe and back again. You march to the beat of your own drummer most of the time.

    Parties, family reunions, even at work – there you are. Alone. On your own. It’s easier that way.

    Wading through countless memories – making jokes that repeatedly fall flat, overhearing disparaging comments about your clothes or interests, even your loved ones thoughtlessly devaluing your very identity.

    Why bother? You don’t seem to fit in quite right – anywhere.

    Explaining yourself – again – has taken its toll.

    All the pressure – all the fear – all the frustration – any thoughtful communication is difficult, if not downright impossible.

    Someone reaches out to you – a second of glimmering possibility. Yet you find yourself quick to react, rather than present enough to pause and ask yourself how you want to show up at this moment.

    The words sometimes pour out in a chaotic rush – embarrassed again!

    All your effort, and yet… so very awkward.

    You wonder if anyone will ever be able to accept you – simply for who you are.

    But the situation’s not hopeless. And you’re not hopeless; far from it.

    You’re Worthy.

    The world needs your unique way of being. Your voice, your perspective, your approach to life are all necessary – and meaningful.

    It’s time you take up the space you deserve.

    It’s ok to put yourself first and safe to believe in yourself.

    Don’t deny yourself – like so many others have.

    Developing self-love is a process.

    Learning to love your quirks and your uniqueness isn’t an overnight phenomenon – it takes dedication, commitment, and consistency.

    It also takes being seen, honored, validated, and valued for who you truly are.

    Confidence and self-appreciation are the keys to your success.

    The feeling of being the black sheep can actually lead you to beautiful places.

    Commit yourself to honoring the individuality you possess.

    Are you going to be scared? Yes.

    Are you willing to do it anyway? I hope so.

    Working with me, you will receive my undivided attention.

    I’ll listen to you and truly hear what you have to say.

    I’ll help you see your superpowers for what they are – unique gifts to improve your life.

    Say YES to yourself. Say YES to this moment. Say YES to the power within.

    Schedule a free discovery call with me today to see if we’re a good fit.

  • Anxiety as Empowerment

    Anxiety as Empowerment

    Worrying is more than a passing feeling.

    You can’t even remember the last time you didn’t worry about something.

    You often find yourself with sweaty palms, tired, and spilling coffee everywhere from your jittery hands.

    Your mind is continually racing, trying to predict the future.

    If you look up “overthinking” in the dictionary, your picture looks back at you (messy bun and all).

    Anxiety is practically your middle name.

    Does any of this sound familiar?

    These feelings are not unique to you.

    The fact is that many people struggle with anxiety. You are not alone!

    Anxiety is a common part of life in our modern world.

    Like many people, you might be constantly striving, thinking about the future, and trying to plan your next moves.

    The function of this is perpetual planning, trying to predict all the potential outcomes for you to feel like you have control over what will happen.

    The fact is that individuals control very little outside of ourselves. And trying to have control sparks more anxiety.

    It’s a vicious cycle.

    One way I like to view anxiety is as an emotion that allows you to deal with stressful situations by pointing you in the direction of where to take action.

    In this way, your anxiety is like a roadmap to freedom.

    But it doesn’t feel this way. It’s stressful!

    If your anxiety seems more persistent, you can learn how to turn your anxiety into a way to empower yourself.

    What? Use anxiety to empower myself? Yup!

    It requires learning to recognize triggers and signals.

    You can start to see these sensations and racing thoughts that usually signal your anxiety as a clue to do some more in-depth inner work.

    Anxiety is showing up because there is a deeper calling that you are not answering.

    There is something more to life that you need help in excavating, uncovering, exploring, and putting into motion.

    And I can teach you how to do this.

    Therapy with me can help you get closer to your true calling and put steps in place to walk in that direction.

    Let’s replace worrying with empowerment.

    If this sounds like work you are ready to do, please reach out to me by clicking here to schedule your free discovery call with me.

  • Mindfulness for Millennials

    Mindfulness for Millennials

    Healing happens in the space between stimulus and response.

    Spiraling out of control…

    Thoughts swirl around in your brain – then, suddenly – you’re swept away by their currents, careening down a rabbit hole you didn’t even know existed within you.

    If only your thoughts didn’t hijack your every experience, life would be so much more enjoyable.

    So powerful. So disruptive. So compelling.

    But there IS a way to overcome.

    Mindfulness empowers you to show up to the present moment as the version of yourself that you genuinely want to be.

    According to teacher Jon Kabat-Zinn, mindfulness is the awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, nonjudgmentally.

    Mindfulness is simply noticing what arises, moment by moment. In your body. Around your body. You can learn to see everything – using the five senses, as well as opening up to your emotional state.

    Mindfulness also provides the opportunity to examine thought and behavior patterns from a distance – to help you create new patterns that serve you at the highest level.

    We all need a vision for where we want to go – and how to get there.

    Dropping into mindfulness can help you cultivate your vision in a heartfelt and powerful way.

    As a therapist, I’ll introduce you to mindfulness and help you apply it to empower you to meet your life as it is, connect your abilities and strengths, and realign yourself with your desired direction in life.

    Together, we’ll use Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), as well as techniques from Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, Mindful Self-Compassion, and other mindfulness interventions.

    But, to be most effective, you must explore mindfulness both within and outside therapy.

    There is no greater gift to ourselves than our willingness to be present to our own lives –
    the good, the bad, and the ugly – and we do this most effectively through mindfulness.
    – Ruth King

    Your life is yours – YOU decide how to live.

    While it’s important to understand that you can’t always control everything that life throws at you, you CAN choose your response.

    You get to show up as the author, show yourself compassion, and give yourself the grace to pause amid the seeming chaos around you.

    What’s the hurry?

    Contrary to popular belief, you don’t need to rush. What is meant for you cannot miss you.

    Mindfulness provides a space for you to rest, to cultivate your most profound sense of yourself, and to make the best choice for you.

    To recognize your emotions as they are, acknowledge the circumstances that lead to your feelings, decide who you want to be in the moment, and show up in a way that honors the direction you’ve chosen for your life.

    It’s essential to use the skills we discuss in therapy in real life. Only in practicing these techniques will you see the value they possess in changing your life.

    Embrace the wandering visitors.

    Witnessing thoughts and feelings as mentors who can teach us can be incredibly empowering.

    Often, our culture encourages us to shove away unpleasant feelings and thoughts.

    Despite that, what you resist persists, as you may well have experienced.

    Mindfulness allows for the bird’s eye view on your behavior patterns – as well as the perspective and space to choose to switch how you approach triggering or overwhelming situations.

    Embrace the good and the bad.

    You don’t have to shove away the negative. You can witness it, honor it, and allow it to teach you. From there, YOU decide what you have the power to change.

    When you can show up to life as it is and choose the way you want to interact with the people and events that compose your experiences, you reclaim your sovereignty. You reclaim your power. You reclaim your voice and choice. Having compassion for yourself then makes it easier to have compassion for others.

    Practicing mindfulness makes being in this challenging world a little easier to bear.

    You are worthy of being safe, living with ease, and feeling peaceful.

    Practicing mindfulness can help bring these sought-after feelings into your day-to-day life.

    Between stimulus and response there is a space.

    Mindfulness helps you discover the power of that space.

    To work with Elise in therapy, start by scheduling a free discovery call with her today.